Nothing makes me happier than reading stories about the imminent demise of ‘social media networking’, even when they’re published in my least favourite newspaper. But wouldn’t you know… just as everyone else is growing out of this puerile nonsense, the World Economic Forum (who are meeting for their annual shin-dig in Davos this week) are embracing it.
Some of you may be wondering why I haven’t written about the conspiracy recently – that is the one to make a mockery of editors everywhere, to turn language into meaningless noise, to pollute our every moment with confusing messages and meaningless drivel, to litter our lives with the pointless delusion that we exist for a purpose, when in fact we are all drones serving the smug and swanky who think they’ve got the better of us in some way or other.
I have been considering my prospects in editorial work. Humanity will always need people who can make sense of business speak and political nonsense and rewrite it in plain English. But the trouble is I have so much trouble understanding the words, I can barely lay claim to being one of those valuable people any more. › Continue reading
A few weeks ago I subscribed to the daily email from Businessdictionary.com. Every day, they send me a business term. As a struggling editor, I thought this might help me understand the words. Or should I say: “enable me to be better able to further my understanding of a whole raft of business words and phrases”? › Continue reading
My world this week has been turned upside down by distractions at Westminster. It’s been quite difficult to think of anything else with all this wondering who’s going when and why. And then – having to choose who to represent me at the European Parliament. Such a long list of candidates! Took me ages to read all their leaflets before making my choice. › Continue reading
You would think that after at least ten or 15 years of the web people would know that brief is good and justified text is difficult to read online. I don’t want to get sued, but I have to say it’s just as well this training company doesn’t teach web writing or plain English. And why are they called Sold Out Trainers – a name that suggests a faint tang of sweaty feet, without actually meaning old running shoes at all? › Continue reading
Life just gets more and more terrifying, doesn’t it? If you thought swine flu and climate change were scary, then gird yourself for the terror of a bank holiday weekend. If you’re planning to leave home, you’d better think again. Statistics show that you’re more than likely to “face delays” as you “brave the chaos”.
Of course, if you’re travelling by train, tannoy announcements apologising and offering pathetic excuses will only add to your misery › Continue reading
The Woolworths Superstore Playset – on sale now
I notice since I raised the alarm last week – about the world being under threat and everything – Gordon Brown claims to have saved it. But he hasn’t saved the Woolworths superstore.
I wonder what went wrong there. Could it have been they weren’t listening to the management consultants?
If only they had turned to the Management Consultancies Association (MCA) website, they might have read the report on ‘Dealing with the Downturn’. That would have told them:
“We have seen nothing like this before.”
May be they did visit the site. But Woollies has been around a long time; their senior managers may not think of themselves as ‘downturn virgins’ and so must have assumed the report wasn’t for them.
May be what Woollies needed was some ‘thought leadership’. If only Logica worked with general stores. They offer “transversal corporate functions“. And who could argue with this statement?